That's a tough statement to hear, isn't it? I remember the first time I heard that in church, that we're all sinners. I remember looking at the people around me, thinking, he can't be talking to me?! Truthfully, my inner monologue went something like this, "Me? What the hell? Who are you to judge me? Screw you!" Yea, not very flattering, but sometimes, honesty isn't always all that flattering. But, I'm fairly certain that we've all had inner monologues we're not always proud of. That's one of the many things that makes us all sinners.
It took me a while, but I finally began to realize, I was offended because I didn't want to look within myself. No one ever wants to admit the ugly they have within. The problem is, we all have the "ugly within" ~ even the nicest people we know. Most don't want to admit it. It is, after all, a tough pill to swallow. Admit that we have faults? Admit that there are times we think negatively about our fellow man? Admit that we gossip? Admit that we've used the Lord's name in vain? The list of man's sins goes on and on.
Unlike our judicial system, the Lord views all sins equally putting no one sin greater then another. In other words, in the Lord's eyes, if you murder someone or if you stole a pencil from the local dime store, guess what ~ level playing field in the Lord's eyes. Tough to hear, isn't it? It's difficult, as Christians, to remember that. We live in a society run by a judicial system that says just the opposite. Please don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that someone that goes on a shooting rampage should be treated like someone who stole a candy bar from the local dime store. The judicial system is in place to protect us. However, as Christians, it's our responsibility to practice forgiveness and love one another, regardless of the sin. Again, not always an easy pill to swallow.
My husband and I were having a discussion about all of the legal reports that are published in the local papers and the amount of gossip and rumors that those can cause. We've all seen them, right? The traffic reports, finance reports and the court reports. Sadly, these things are often the basis of gossip and rumors. "Did you see so-and-so filed bankruptcy?" "Did you see so-and-so didn't pay their property taxes?" "Did you see so-and-so was pulled over for drinking and driving?" The list goes on and on.
During the course of the conversation, I wondered, what prompts people to read those things anyway? My husbands response, "I read them because they make me feel better about myself." And that's when it hit me: He's exactly right. He didn't mean to give me the answer I was looking for, he was just being completely honest. This is why people read these things, and worse yet, why they turn that and other things into gossip and rumors: it diverts their attention from their selves and their own "ugly within". It's how we are as a society in general. We focus on what others are doing wrong, because it makes us feel better about ourselves. As though their sins are more severe then ours.
Some of you may not agree with that, which to me, only further proves my theory. And that's ok. I love you anyway. Am I perfect? Not by a long shot. I don't even pretend to be. I know what my sins are, do you know what yours are?
As we approach 2011, I have a challenge for everyone (including myself). When you read these things, or you hear gossip or rumors, rather then feeding the "rumor fire", pray for them. Pray for the person who's gossiping, pray they they find peace within themselves. Pray for the person the gossip is about. We don't know each others stories, or what puts us in particular situations. When someone approaches you and says, "did you hear about so-and-so", consider these prayer requests.
In the end, there is one who can judge us, and that is the Lord himself. We are all sinners saved by His grace. Lets focus on admitting and correcting our own sins, this is truly how we'll lead others to Christ. By example.
God, you know my foolishness. My sins aren’t hidden from you. Psalms 69:5
Monday, December 20, 2010
Friday, December 3, 2010
My Journey
During my time in the church, I have learned that Christians generally tend to have two answers about when they came to know Christ: #1 I was raised in a Christian family, church has always been part of my life or #2 One day, during a specific event, "I had an ah ha moment".
As a matter of clarification, I, personally, don't feel that answer #1 is necessarily a clarifying statement. I don't believe that being raised in a Christian home, necessarily makes you a Christian, nor does it attest to your relationship with Christ. I do believe that being raised in a Christian home can help you and aid you in how you treat others and your general attitude on life, and hopefully, this gives you the tools to develop your personal relationship with Christ.
As for me? I obviously didn't start out in a Christian environment, nor did I have that "ah ha moment". For me, I've had random moments of generalization.
When I was first put into foster care, I was angry, bitter, scared. My personal relationship with Christ was, in my eyes, non existent. For about the first 6 months to a year, I struggled. I struggled with being in a new school, a new home and therapy. Despite my struggles, there were many things I was instantly thankful for. Warm meals. As shallow as this sounds, I was thankful for: new clothes. I was able to go shopping and buy new clothes. Something I had never done before. (on a side note . . . as excited as I was about that, I'm not a shopper. Never have been, don't think I ever will be). And friendships with my peers.
As a means for "Prince Charming" to keep his secret, more often then not, I was grounded for some reason or another. For me, this meant confinement to my room in the basement without meals. This is where my books came in very handy. I was, of course, allowed upstairs to do my chores, which consisted mainly of doing the dishes, vacuuming, dusting, and my personal favorite ~ picking up dog poo in the yard. As gross as that was, I often took my time with that one. Aside from walking to and from school, the library, or the church, this was often my only opportunity to be outside.
Stored next to my room, was the food the "Host" received from commodities. If you're unfamiliar with commodities, it was a food program for Native Americans. Canned fruit, vegetables, corn syrup, peanut butter and cheese. When I would be brought upstairs to take care of the dishes, I would often slip the can opener in a pocket or hide it in the stair well when no one was looking. Needless to say, I ate my fair share of canned fruit and peanut butter, and yes, the occasional "sip" of corn syrup. It took years before I could eat peanut butter or canned fruit again ~ shocker right? So you can understand my deep appreciation for warm, healthy meals.
But, I digress. As time went on, I began to thrive. My relationship with my foster parents, who, from here are out are simply, my parents. My friendships with my peers were excelling. There was even a boy or two in the mix. I was in one on one therapy as well as group therapy, and both went very well. I was on the B honor roll in school. I was in sports, drama and choir.
My senior year of high school, when I went to my final court hearing, the judge told me how proud he was of me. How absolutely impressed he was by how far I had come. I can't even begin to tell you how much that meant to me.
I could continue on from here, and highlight all the details in my life that I finally looked back on (many years after the fact), and realized, God has always been with me. But, as there are many of those moments that have occurred in my 35 years of life, I don't want to bore you, so we'll flash forward a bit :-).
My realization came slowly, with my first knowledge being "everything happens for a reason". Progressed to, ok, yes, God is there, BUT, I don't need to be baptized, baptize my children, OR get out of bed on Sunday mornings to prove my beliefs. If God loves me, he'll love me even when I'm in my own home.
Truthfully, I do still firmly believe that going to church isn't what makes me, or anyone else for that matter, a Christian. You've heard the saying, "going to church doesn't make me a Christian anymore then standing in the garage makes me a car". Very true. The church building itself isn't a magical place. It's just a building. A group of believers congregating in the park, at the mall, in someones living room ~ you get the idea, will have the same affect.
I believe that having Christ in your life is a constant journey. There will always be trials and tribulations. The firmer you are in your faith, the more we seem to be tested. I am happy to say, I have finally become strong enough, that regardless of what obstacle stands before me, I know I can over come it because God is with me.
I am also happy to say, that on December 12th, myself, along with my children, will be baptized. A huge turning point in my life, as well as a joyful one. My personal relationship with Christ has given me new light on life and I look forward to my continued journey and developing an even stronger bond with our Lord, and hopefully helping others along the way.
My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; He is my fortress, I will never be shaken. Psalm 62:1-2
As a matter of clarification, I, personally, don't feel that answer #1 is necessarily a clarifying statement. I don't believe that being raised in a Christian home, necessarily makes you a Christian, nor does it attest to your relationship with Christ. I do believe that being raised in a Christian home can help you and aid you in how you treat others and your general attitude on life, and hopefully, this gives you the tools to develop your personal relationship with Christ.
As for me? I obviously didn't start out in a Christian environment, nor did I have that "ah ha moment". For me, I've had random moments of generalization.
When I was first put into foster care, I was angry, bitter, scared. My personal relationship with Christ was, in my eyes, non existent. For about the first 6 months to a year, I struggled. I struggled with being in a new school, a new home and therapy. Despite my struggles, there were many things I was instantly thankful for. Warm meals. As shallow as this sounds, I was thankful for: new clothes. I was able to go shopping and buy new clothes. Something I had never done before. (on a side note . . . as excited as I was about that, I'm not a shopper. Never have been, don't think I ever will be). And friendships with my peers.
As a means for "Prince Charming" to keep his secret, more often then not, I was grounded for some reason or another. For me, this meant confinement to my room in the basement without meals. This is where my books came in very handy. I was, of course, allowed upstairs to do my chores, which consisted mainly of doing the dishes, vacuuming, dusting, and my personal favorite ~ picking up dog poo in the yard. As gross as that was, I often took my time with that one. Aside from walking to and from school, the library, or the church, this was often my only opportunity to be outside.
Stored next to my room, was the food the "Host" received from commodities. If you're unfamiliar with commodities, it was a food program for Native Americans. Canned fruit, vegetables, corn syrup, peanut butter and cheese. When I would be brought upstairs to take care of the dishes, I would often slip the can opener in a pocket or hide it in the stair well when no one was looking. Needless to say, I ate my fair share of canned fruit and peanut butter, and yes, the occasional "sip" of corn syrup. It took years before I could eat peanut butter or canned fruit again ~ shocker right? So you can understand my deep appreciation for warm, healthy meals.
But, I digress. As time went on, I began to thrive. My relationship with my foster parents, who, from here are out are simply, my parents. My friendships with my peers were excelling. There was even a boy or two in the mix. I was in one on one therapy as well as group therapy, and both went very well. I was on the B honor roll in school. I was in sports, drama and choir.
My senior year of high school, when I went to my final court hearing, the judge told me how proud he was of me. How absolutely impressed he was by how far I had come. I can't even begin to tell you how much that meant to me.
I could continue on from here, and highlight all the details in my life that I finally looked back on (many years after the fact), and realized, God has always been with me. But, as there are many of those moments that have occurred in my 35 years of life, I don't want to bore you, so we'll flash forward a bit :-).
My realization came slowly, with my first knowledge being "everything happens for a reason". Progressed to, ok, yes, God is there, BUT, I don't need to be baptized, baptize my children, OR get out of bed on Sunday mornings to prove my beliefs. If God loves me, he'll love me even when I'm in my own home.
Truthfully, I do still firmly believe that going to church isn't what makes me, or anyone else for that matter, a Christian. You've heard the saying, "going to church doesn't make me a Christian anymore then standing in the garage makes me a car". Very true. The church building itself isn't a magical place. It's just a building. A group of believers congregating in the park, at the mall, in someones living room ~ you get the idea, will have the same affect.
I believe that having Christ in your life is a constant journey. There will always be trials and tribulations. The firmer you are in your faith, the more we seem to be tested. I am happy to say, I have finally become strong enough, that regardless of what obstacle stands before me, I know I can over come it because God is with me.
I am also happy to say, that on December 12th, myself, along with my children, will be baptized. A huge turning point in my life, as well as a joyful one. My personal relationship with Christ has given me new light on life and I look forward to my continued journey and developing an even stronger bond with our Lord, and hopefully helping others along the way.
My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; He is my fortress, I will never be shaken. Psalm 62:1-2
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